Please accept my apologies for the length of time between postings. Life, as we all know too well, tends to get in the way of pontification far too often. Also, there's been very little Peace Corps updates recently. I'll share what's been going on.
Sometime in December, I got yet another Dental package in the mail. It asked that I go get another check up, as the one that originally cleared me was going to expire before departure. Meanwhile, one of my wisdom teeth had been slowly coming in. The initial exam required a full jaw x-ray (I'm blanking on the formal term, but these are not routinely performed). It was then that the dentist informed me it was possible Peace Corps might request that I have all four wisdom teeth removed prior to departure. Fingers crossed and breath held while I waited for dental clearance, because wisdom tooth extraction is f-ing expensive when you are not covered for dental!
Anywho, I tried my hardest denial-like-self to pretend that the now visible tooth was a non-issue. It didn't bother me, so why bother it? My dentist thought otherwise. I made the appointment and two weeks later sat awake Novocained up the wazoo, doing yogic breathing while the doc drilled and sliced away. It was a most glorious afternoon. Being a female in the hormonal height of my cycle, the healing process was incredibly slow. It took two full weeks for recovery. I had to return to the office because the discomfort was so extreme in the beginning. One of those weeks I was on a pain killer and wine diet = fat cow Carolyn.
Interestingly, they gave me the dry socket natural medicine - Clove. I injected the sticky brown goo into the gaping hole for about a week. Every application I thought, this is what cigarettes and clove cigarettes do over time - numb the area. And I would feel proud to have (nearly) kicked the bad habit. I never thought I'd have to fight the urge to smoke cigarettes. I had my first drag when I was 18. But, because of my family's history with cancer and my childhood disgust with the smell (I would refuse to eat in restaurants that had smoking sections to the bane of my parents and brothers) it took three years of living and going out with smokers before I felt compelled to buy a pack of yellow American Spirits on my 21st birthday. Now, don't go thinking I bought packs in succession from there on out. Like I said, the relationship is a complicated one. There is only a small part of me that finds smoking acceptable. And with every glass of wine and emotional situation, that part grows until it's larger than the rational parts of my brain. It's then that I find a cigarette. And unfortunately, many of my loved ones smoke. They also tend to confide upsetting things to me, and then offer me a cigarette. It's a very vicious cycle.
Why am I talking about this at all? I haven't bought a pack of cigarettes since September and haven't smoked more than one cigarette in a 24hr pd in over a month. But occasionally, the urge is still there and being that I was asked to sign a waiver by the Peace Corps proclaiming I understood the organization highly discouraged smoking, I want it to be irrelevant by the time I leave. Also, when comparing a 50 yr old life-long smoker to a 50 yr old that smoked but quit a good 20 yrs ago, it's obvious which side you want to be on.
To sum things up: I'm vain and like a good buzz. Two things that I'm hoping will lessen over time while in Armenia. Oh, and I have one less tooth to worry about.
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